Thursday, May 14, 2026

A True Story


Well this is based on an almost true story. The names have been changed. The first email was from what the person who wanted to say one thing and went through more diplomatic drafts at the recommendation of her boss and mentor.

Place:                   A corporation of 122 employees

Participants:       Sally White, Human Resources Manager

                            Jennifer Rice, Assistant HR Manager

Date:                   15 June

*****

From:  Jennifer Rice

To: All staff

Date:  15 June

Subject: (F*ç%&=?R) dirty underwear in lunch room

Get it out. Now!!! It's disgusting.

Thought I'd send it to you for comment before I sent it.


From:  Sally White

To: Jennifer Rice

Date: 15 June

Subject: Your memo to staff on dirty underwear in the lunch room

I really appreciate you showing me the memo on the underwear before sending it. I think it does need to be toned down into corporate diplomatic language. If you need to vent, please stop by my office.


From:  Jennifer    

To:  Sally White 

Date:  15 June

Subject:  Underwear in lunch room. Is this better????

To the idiot who left his filthy, disgusting underwear in the lunch room. GET IT OUT!

Is this better, Sally????


From:  Sally

To:  Jennifer

Date:  15 June

Subject:  Underwear in lunch room

Not quite, but better. You're getting there. Give it another softer try.


From:  Jennifer

To:  Sally

Date:  15 June

Subject:  Underwear in lunch room

The staff eats in the lunch room, it is better not to have dirty underwear on the tables where people eat.


From:  Jennifer

To:  Sally

Date:  15 June

Subject:  Underwear in lunch room


From:  Sally

To:   Jennifer

Date: 15 June

Subject:  Underwear in lunch room

I think that might be TMI, too much information, although our staff does like knowing reasons things are done. Please try again.


From:  Jennifer

To:  Sally

Date: 15 June

Subject:  The lunch room  -- personal belongings

Whomever left belongings of a personal nature in the lunchroom, please pick them up as soon as possible. You know who you are.


From:  Sally

To:  Jennifer

Date: 15 June

Subject:  The lunch room --  personal belongings 

Latest attempt. And it's whoever not whomever. I know you are taking a creative writing course, but corporate diplomacy is a different type of writing.


From:  Jennifer

To:   Sally

Date:  15 June

Subject:  Personal items in the lunch room

Someone has left articles of personal clothing in the lunch room. Could you please collect them as soon as possible.


To:  Jennifer

From:  Sally:

Date:  15 June

Subject:  You nailed it

Change "articles of personal clothing" to "personal items" and send it. 


From:  Jennifer

To:   All Staff

Date:  15 June

Subject:  Personal items in the lunch room

Someone has left articles of personal items in the lunch room. Could you please collect them as soon as possible.


To:  Jennifer

From:  Sally:

Date:  15 June

Subject:   Thanks 

No comments: