Toilet Paper and Book Security

 

Because I worried about running out of toilet paper, Husband Rick built a wall of toilet paper in the bathroom. I then had toilet paper security.

That may have been a joke, but less funny is losing book security. 

 

When we are at home in Geneva, we have the English library nestled on the ground floor of the Emmanuel Church. For only a 125 CHF (US$156) family membership a year we can each take out six of their 11,000+ books for a month. We do and do read them.

 

They also have regular book sales of used books at really low prices.

There's a number of English book stores, with Pages & Sips our favorite.

We order books that the Library might not have. This bag below is full of books we ordered to take back to Southern France for our fall reading security.

There were two English book sources in Argelès that we lost. My late friend Barbara had a used book store. Monsieur Livre, a man in shaky healthy, just died. On marché days he sat in the window of his living room facing the street. The sill was covered with French books (if I wasn't so lazy I'd read more in French). There was a box of English books in a case below the window for the price of 3 Euros (US$3.45) per book. The only problem, many of the books we had given him for his resale.

Kiosks and old telephone booths are spring up in both places. 

Friends exchange books when we know the other person will love the discards.

I'm reading my way through the canicule (heatwave). Thanks to books, I've been in Edinburgh walking down Princes Street, which I love, and through Waverly Station. Bagpipes play in my imagination, as I delve into the lives of the people on the pages. 

I said good bye to Scotland and moved to Maine  and another family. I felt the cool breeze and icy water. Even the mosquito swarms seemed real to me.

Leaving Maine, I am now in Australia without ever have to get on a plane or go through customs.My new friends are sporty tennis players.

I expect to finish my six library books and will exchange them for six more in two to three weeks.

 

If the canicule has abated maybe we'll walk along the lake, maybe check out the photo exhibition along the shore, maybe eat at Le Cottage or have an ice cream. If the canicule hasn't abated, I'm content with my book security at home.

 

Tattoos

 

"It's so working class," I said to my friend in describing my daughter's tattoo. It was a beautiful blue tiger on her left shoulder blade.

My friend, not knowing me to be a snob, relied. "My dear, we're all working class."

I have mixed feelings on tattoos.

The first I saw on a woman in the 1970s was just to the left of her cleavage, a tiny rose with a variety of delicate pink petals. It was beautiful.

How much pain do people go through, especially those who have much of their bodies tattooed?

I've complimented people with beautiful and/or interesting tattoos. 

But then I think... 

...what if 40 years from now they hate them? Or their skin is so wrinkled the tattoo sends a different message.  

These are the thoughts of a COW (Cranky Old Woman) who has gone through many fads like wearing a ring on every finger of a weight and size that if I fell overboard from a boat I would sink and drown. Today I wear two, thin, wedding and engagement rings. I can't even find most of the rings I had including the one with chains to my wrist bracelet.

As a joke for my daughter I applied a temporary tattoo. She saw through it immediately.

What would I get as a tattoo? Dump Trump? Hopefully that will be outdated before I'm outdated.

I think of the Leonard Cohen lover who had the first bars of Hallelujah tattooed on his neck along with the words? 

As a writer, do I have a favorite line from one of my books to forever be written on my body? If so, which part of my body?

Perhaps I could start with a quill pen sticking out of an ink bottle? Then if it didn't hurt too much, we could add a piece of paper with scribbles. Where? Maybe above my ankle. Or not... 

 

To hug or not to hug

 

Handshake?

Two-cheek kiss?

Three-cheek kiss?

Hug?

Living in two countries with friends from many countries what is the best way to politely greet a friend, acquaintance, colleague? 

Business greetings are the easiest. A handshake. Works internationally. 

Then it gets tricky.

Swiss friends are a three-cheek kiss although after 36-years here I'm never sure whether to start on my right or left or theirs.

Then we transfer to the south of France and we lose one kiss. It takes a couple of days to not go in for that third kiss. I kinda hang out, lips a-pucker.

And the reverse is true on returning to Switzerland. The kissee angles in for that third kiss while I'm backing away as if I was disturbed by their bad breath. 

There was the time with a group in Florida who did the two-cheek kiss, probably started by one of the women who had visited France. Those were mostly air kisses. I suspect some of the women were checking the label sewn into the neck of whatever the kissee was wearing. 

I didn't come from a huggy family. As an adult I had a friend who "gave good hugs," which captured every needed emotion and made me grateful for all the hugs then and in my future.

Another friend, an anthropologist who was six feet plus, would come at you, arms open and engulf you. My daughter, until she was a teenager, would back up. Hugged by my friend meant no matter what life was good at that exact moment. Decades later, having lost our friend, both my daughter and myself would love to have one of her hugs.

A Swiss couple, neighbors in France, gives up the three-cheek kiss in France for the two but not when we meet in Switzerland when its three. They've evolved into huggers. Number of cheek kisses aren't important anymore.

Men hug too sometimes. I notice usually men give a double pat on the back during a hug. Frenchmen will do a double cheek kiss.

I researched the psychology of hugging for this blog. According to scientists our brains react to touch positively. Certain hormones jump into action at touch: oxytocin, dopamine, serotine.

I'm a happy hugger no matter where. And you?

 

 

 

 

 

Free Write-Newspaper Reader

 

Hurray! 

For the first time in several months the three  Free Writers are in the same country, town, café for the Free Write.

We looked for a "victim" a human we could write about. In getting the photo we had to be careful our "victim" could not be identified. 

All three of us seemed to to hit on the same idea.

Rick's Free Write 

He moseyed in through the automatic sliding door, stepped carefully down the stairs to the pastry counter, ordered only a noisette, and carried it back to the terrace level, choosing the corner table.

He grabbed both tabloid newspapers off the center counter – Le Temps and TDG – and parked his black backpack in one of the three vacant chairs.

The chaleur was the main news in both, which meteorologists had declared to be fini after 10 days. But despite the brief evening rain and overnight drop in temperatures, another heat dome was expected within a week and would again be 33, 34, 35C…

He turned his attention to the world news. The ceasefire in War 1 was on again. Supposedly. The ceasefire in War 2 had held for 10 days with only a few people killed each day. The ceasefire in War 3 - only 7 had died, all children. The ceasefire in War 3 never was.

Ah, sports. Wawrinka was retiring. He and Federer would play an exhibition in November at Palexpo. Tickets had sold out immediately.

South Africa was the first to get knocked out of the World Cup round of 16. Canada had a new unlikely hero.

He finished his mini-coffee, returned the papers to the counter, grabbed his backpack and slid out the auto door.

D-L's Free Write

"Scandal. Damned politicians." Frank turned to page two to continue reading the story. He would get back to stories on Gaza, Ukraine, Iraq, earthquakes, volcanoes, fires,

His espresso was cooling.

He looked at his watch. He had another hour before Maria said he could come home. 

When he retired, it almost broke up his marriage. Was it his fault that he thought of a better schedule for her? Wanted to rearrange the furniture? 

Retired Husband Syndrome, the marriage counselor told them. Marie had had days to herself to do what she wanted for years. No longer.

The solution? Frank would get out of the house, get an espresso, read the paper. Sometimes the news was so depressing like today.

The tea room doors opened and Sally and her four-year old son  came in.

Bobby ran straight for his new friend Frank. "We're going to the park. Wanta come?"

"Maybe he has something else to do,"Sally said. 

He didn't. It would be nice to watch Bobby play on the slide as he had watched his own sons so long ago. 

"If retirement is boring, it's your job to make it interesting," Marie had said.¨

"I'd love to come."

Julia's Free Write 

Ah the luxury – a free morning.

After having pondered on what he “should” do, he decided to do what he wanted to do – once in a lifetime would surely be O.K.?

Thu it was that he found himself in one of his favorite coffee shops, a corner table overlooking green spaces with a glimpse of lake in the distance.

As he settled in for his coffee with one of his favorite papers, he reflected on his luck.

And perhaps should have stuck to that instead of opening said newspaper.

The world outside was falling apart from famine in one corner to war in several others.

Then there was the multitude of articles trying to explain the thought process of world leaders who had no clear thoughts, or only those of “it’s mine, I want it”, “you owe me because I say so” or “I’ll take what I want, mankind be damned”.

Here and there would be an article on the current devastating natural disasters.

Enough already he said to himself as he put down his paper and picked up his novel: time for escape reading!

 

 

 

Rick Adams is an aviation journalist and publisher of www.aviationvoices.com, a weekly newsletter reporting the airline industry  top stories . He is the author of The Robot in the Simulator. AI in Aviation Training.  

Visit D-L.'s website  https://dlnelsonwriter.com, She is the author of 15 fiction and three non fiction books. Her 300 Unsung Women, bios of women who battled gender limitations, can be purchased  at https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/300-unsung-women-d-l-nelson/1147305797?ean=9798990385504 

Visit Julia's blog. She has written and taken photos and loves syncing up with friends.  Her blog can be found: https://viewsfromeverywhere.blogspot.com/ 

 

Coat Hangers and Knitting Needles - Fertility fights

In researching the book Coat Hangers and Knitting Needles, two of the most depressing things were the fight to keep birth control away from women. The second was the individual women's stories. Even when I was engaged my doctor told me to come back for a diaphragm after I was married.

Fertility Fights

 What frustrated Sanger was how many women she met had tried self-induced abortions. Most had been told when they asked their doctors how to prevent pregnancy—abstinence. 

When Margaret Sanger became active in fighting for women to have access to birth control, she was often ignored. The message that too many children could destroy a family because of inadequate resources took years to reach lawmaker’s ears.

Margaret Higgins Sanger (1879-1966) made the term “birth control” popular. Much of her early adult life was spent crusading for women to have access to birth control. To do it, she had to break the law.

Sanger was born Margaret Louise Higgins in Corning, New York. Her father, Michael H. Higgins, was an Irish immigrant who left the Catholic church. Although he wanted to be a doctor, he ended up working as a stonemason.

Her mother, Anne, emigrated from Ireland during the potato famine. The couple had 11 children and seven unsuccessful births. Anne died at 49.

How being a child from such a large family shaped Sanger’s attitudes about birth control is conjecture.

Her older sisters helped Sanger go to Claverack College and Hudson River Institute. She started nurses training at White Plains Hospital.

She married William Sanger in 1902. They had three children.

After a fire destroyed the Sanger couple’s home in Hastings-on Hudson, the family moved to New York City.

The marriage ended in 1921. Although she remarried, she continued her work under the Sanger name.

Not Preventing Pregnancy Led to Abortions

Sanger worked in the slums as a visiting nurse. Her husband was an architect. Both were social activists. What frustrated Sanger was how many women she met had tried self-induced abortions. Most had been told when they asked their doctors how to prevent pregnancy—abstinence.

The advice was unrealistic and unsatisfactory.

Sanger considered women controlling their own fertility mandatory. Her method of activism to promote her belief that contraception and empowerment were linked was through the written word.

She created pamphlets, which could not legally be distributed through the mail because of the Comstock Laws. Instead she used family-planning and birth control clinics such as Harlem Birth Control, which she founded, boosting distribution to several hundred thousand copies.

The clinic had all-female doctors and a 100% African-American advisory council. Later, African-Americans were added to the staff.

She created a monthly newsletter, The Woman Rebel. Its slogan was “No Gods, No Masters,” borrowed from the Industrial Workers of the World who used it in the 1912 Lawrence Textile Strike. Sanger’s pamphlets with detailed descriptions of contraception methods challenged the Comstock Laws.

The Postal Service suppressed seven of 11 issues of her newsletter. Sanger was arrested. She escaped to the U.K. in 1914. While there, she came under the influence of Havelock Ellis, who believed sex should be safe and pleasurable for women.

Sanger wrote two articles for New York Call that would produce some outrage for their frankness:   

• “What Every Mother Should Know”       
•  “What Every Girl Should Know”
•  They were published in book format in 1916. A1917 edition also had information on:  
•  Cervical caps  
•  Diaphragms 
• Douches

Her book, Family Limitation, caused her to be prosecuted again under the Comstock Laws. It is still available in a 2017 edition. On Amazon, many of the reader reviews show a lack of understanding of the danger that this advice, the best available at the time, brought her.

It is hard to believe today that something like distributing birth control information would lead to 30 days in a workhouse and include force-feeding. That happened to Sanger’s sister and fellow birth-control advocate Ethel Byrne. Even more disturbing, at Sanger’s trial the judge said that women did not have the right to “to copulate with a feeling of security that there will be no resulting conception.”

Sanger would be arrested eight times.

She refused to promise she would not break the law again. A victory of sorts happened when Judge Frederick E. Crane ruled in the New York Court of Appeals that doctors could provide contraception information. The catch was that they should only prescribe birth control for reasons of health.

In 1917 Sanger began publishing the Birth Control Review, which was designed to promote support to the medical and legislative communities as well as the middle and upper classes. It encouraged readers to join the American Birth Control League (she founded ABCL in 1921), which later became Planned Parenthood. Publication stopped in 1929. The themes were:

• Children should be conceived in love
• Children should be born of their mother’s conscious desire
• Children should be created only under conditions which make possible the heritage of health

Sanger had the financial support of John D. Rockefeller Jr. for her ABCL.

Her work was not limited to the U.S. She discovered that the method of family planning in Asia was infanticide, most often of a female baby. She worked with writer and 1938 Nobel Prize for Literature winner and fighter for women’s rights Pearl Buck to open a family planning clinic in Shanghai.

Sanger had internal political problems with one group. Recently, her belief in eugenics sparked criticism that surfaced again in the 2016 Hillary Clinton campaign for U.S. president.

Sanger divided society into three groups:

1.  The educated and informed, who limited family size
2.  The intelligent and responsible, who wanted to control family size despite lacking some of the resources
3.   Irresponsible and reckless people with “religious scruples” She felt that the third group should be stopped from reproducing.       

Her National Committee on Federal Legislation for Birth Control, a lobbying group to overturn restrictions on contraception, began in 1929.

Frustrated by lack of results, she ordered a diaphragm in 1931 by mail, which was confiscated.

Finally, in 1936, a court decision overturned part of the Comstock Laws. Doctors could order contraception products.

A greater victory came in 1937. The American Medical Association decided contraception was a medical service and was added to the curriculum of many medical schools.

She was nominated for but did not win the Nobel Peace Prize.

Sanger died at age 86 from congestive heart failure, but she lived to see the Griswold v. Connecticut Supreme Court decision legalizing birth control for married women.

Today birth control in many forms is considered normal. Many people today cannot imagine that not only was birth control once considered immoral it could result in prison much as abortion today in some places.