Carpe Diem is hard

  

On my Facebook page, I often write Carpe Diem/Happiness and list all the small things that bring me joy. The photo of my dog asleep in my husband's armpit before we start our day would be an example.

I feel as if I'm living in a bubble where I keep things as simple as possible and am surrounded by people I love, like and share with.

I know how lucky I am living in Southern France and Geneva, Switzerland, beautiful places with my soul mate, a kind, generous, intelligent, well educated man who as a fringe benefit is also a writer.

We have everything we need, more income than outgo and are debt free.

Our problems are the normal day to day things: a lost key, a bank error, mold on something in the frigo.

Our disagreements are few, more on the ridiculous: my neat idiosyncrasies, his food finickiness.

As much as I try and preserve my feeling of peace, the outside world intrudes.

I long ago learned that the America presented to me was nothing but a myth with some bits of good, enough good bits to keep the myth alive. I suppose it is my fault for having read too much history, biography and (gulp) even economics to see a realistic past.

From the 60s on and in various amounts of activity I've been political: demonstrations, writing congress. Even after moving overseas I would call on important issues and say, "I'm an expat and I vote."

Now, I've never felt so hopeless for my birth country. I see hatred, lies, cruelty, inequality. I see the alleged leaders destroying not just the country but the planet. I see pain and deaths that should never have happened. I see people saying things that have no basis in reality. I see capitalism gone amok until the only guideline is the amount of profit let all else be damned.

The wars, not just the Ukraine, but those in other parts of the world seep into my consciousness.  I wake up, grateful no bombs fell on me last nigh even if the chance was remote.

I see my birth country armed beyond all reasonableness. I see deaths of children who should have lived to grow up. 

I wish I could shut those things out and concentrate on those I love, things that are beautiful, friends, family. Sometimes it works for a short time.

My husband has a dueling blog at https://lovinglifeineurope.blogspot.com/2022/05/this-is-america-2022.html

I hope we are wrong about a civil war.