I never bathe

"I want to change my room. It has no bath, no shower," the American said to the French hotel manager Daniel, a man whose eyes out-twinkled the best Santa. He was roly-poly  like Santa too.

"Madame, I regret we are full."

"Maybe I can change with someone who has a bathtub."

"Our rooms only have showers," he said. After she'd left he said to me in French, "She has the best room in the hotel."

I have only had one bath in the last 60 years.

No, I don't stink. I shower almost daily and sometimes twice depending.

I adore passionately a shower with hot water streaming down my back, lathering myself with whatever body wash smells wonderful.

My ex-boss and I used to often start conversations with "While I was in the shower..." Both of us used to get ideas during our morning showers. I have always started my writing day while showering sometimes concentrating so long, that my skin pukered.

After seeing a program with someone relaxing in a bath about 15 year ago, I thought I would try. It looked wonderful.

I filled the tub with water and bubbles, lit blue candles to match the tile, put Enya on the CD-player.

This should be wonderful I thought, after a tiring day.

I stepped in.

The heat was warming after being outside in the a cold winter air.

I sank into the water with only my head above the bubbles.

Enya's voice drifted from the other room.

The candles flickered.

I shut my eyes thinking I would relax maybe plan the night's writing.

YEWEEEEE! MEGA YUCK YUCK YUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What I thought was -- I am sitting in my own body dirt. Juices from inside, perhaps a rear end wiped only 99% clean despite best efforts is bringing things I don't want onto the rest of me. Never mind sweat nor the smell of garlic that I cut up when I was cooking and was still on my hands despite washing. Who knows what other bacteria might be swirling around in the water instead of being washed away.

YEWEEEEE! MEGA YUCK YUCK YUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I felt dirty. I jumped up and turned on the shower as the bubbles slipped down the drain.

The water drowned out Enya as I planned what I would write after I dried off.