The Dear John Society

 

When I was in grad school working on a masters in PR, one of my profs was Pat Jackson. He was also president of the Public Relations Society of America.

Pat believed in sincerity in all communications and talked about the Dear John Society.

Letters, he said, should only start with Dear if the person was dear. He believed instead use the opening to trigger the reader's interest. Examples: 

• That was a good meeting Bob... 
• I am offering you the post Ms Filmore... 
• The numbers on the attached sheet John...

Never close with sincerely unless you are sincere such as:

• I hope we can meet soon Bill...
• I am so glad we came to an agreement Henry... 
• What else has to be accomplished Mary...   

I adopted it both personally and professionally.  

I started a correspondence with the head of the Credit Union Executive Society. They were holding a conference which I wanted to attend. It was in Missouri, which had not passed the Equal Rights Amendment. I went anyway and am glad I did. I met my husband.  

I did not know that the CEO was a follower of the Dear John Society. That was the seed of his becoming my professional mentor and friend that has gone on more than forty years. 

With email we write less letters. Email over all is far less formal. So many now start with Hello, Hi with or without my name (and sometimes the wrong name), directly into the subject.

If it's a friend it might be things like forgive me for not answering sooner, I'm having a get together, or right into the topic which was the purpose of the Dear John Society. 

Content however is important. In business and in personal dealings it too easy to write quickly and hit send in comparison to the work of printing out a letter, putting it in an envelope and mailing it the old fashioned way.

I'm not suggesting we go back to communicating by regular mail. The speed of sharing information around the planet can involve minutes not days, weeks and months.  

Was there ever a Dear John Society? 

Maybe it was just a group of PR professionals who wanted to be more effective in their communications. 

There's a hidden message. When sending a message make it count. Or maybe communicating with meaning is a good way to live.