Things I Didn't Do...

 

 

Over the years, there were so many things I tried to do but either failed or realized they were not possible.

Moving to Paris in 1962

I thought we should go to Paris when my first husband finished his army obligation in the army band in Stuttgart. I had loved living in Europe.  I would write and he could concentrate on his music. He thought I was crazy. However, at the same time I was desperate to finish my degree, so returning to the U.S. wasn't all that awful.

Not teaching

My degree was in English/History with the idea I would teach. I didn't take education courses because I wanted the subject courses. After graduation I went to Tufts for the education courses. I disliked student teaching. Time to look for something else.

Moving to Colorado

After my divorce I had thought about moving to Colorado Springs with my toddler. I had friends there. To earn a living I thought about opening a cleaning service. It was not reasonable to separate my daughter and her father. I stayed in Boston.

Becoming a lawyer

It was obvious to me that I needed to break out of the secretarial mode if I wanted to earn a better living and use my degree, I would need to do something. My divorce lawyer, Maguerite Pettipit, made a good living in family law. I decided to take the LSATS and looked at different Boston law schools. To make sure I was on the right track I went to work for a small law firm as a secretary. It took about a month that I decided I wouldn't enjoy the law.

Working packing fish in Iceland

All my life I wanted to be a writer. I'd been a cub reporter at 16 but any attempts to get a journalistic job had failed. I thought if I could put together enough money, I'd be able to take time off from earning my living as a writer in Paris for a year. I heard that Iceland wanted fish packers and I thought I could work for them a year, save money, and then write in Paris for a year. I bought an Iceland language book.  They had no interest in me.

Moving to France

Once my daughter graduated high school, I started to look for work in France seriously. I sold my house and moved. Before I could find a job, my mother developed cancer. I could have ignored it, but I figured guilt would take years of psychiatry. I moved back to Boston.

Not working for a software company

I found a job in Switzerland where I was not suited but held my own. To get that job I had sent out over 800 CVs to advertised jobs and used directories to get names of HR, PR, and marketing people in Germany and France. I answered an ad in the IHT for the Swiss post and within a month I was living in Neuchätel.

I passionately loved living there, but I needed another job. I did not have the right permit to change. One company told me I'd be perfect but I was too old and a woman. I could only change one of those things and didn't want to.

There was a software company startup in Ireland that would have hired me. They had a great product to balance different currencies each day. They were still looking for financing. It was just as well I didn't move because the Euro put them out of business.

Loving tea but not working for its promotion

I flew to the Netherlands to interview for a job with the International Tea Association. I removed myself from consideration when I realized with the amount of travel I would have to put my daughter in boarding school, and I enjoyed being her mother far too much. During that trip, I went to France to research my first novel.

It's okay I didn't do these things

I think of them as either false starts or dreams that were enjoyed in the dreaming. In each case what didn't work, the next twist in my life did. 

The two big goals since childhood of living in Europe and being a writer came true. Career was more earning a good living than devotion to a company. Most of my jobs were enjoyable and challenging. 

I did finish my B.A. and received my M.A. from a university in Wales. I even taught a few courses at a university in Geneva.

I found my soul mate at 71. I've published 17 books and am working on my 18th. I live in both Switzerland and the south of France. I'm no longer American, which was a necessity to have a normal financial life and even gave testimony to Congress on the problems expats were having. I ran my own financial newsletter for Canadian credit union executives. I've taken Canadian and Swiss nationalities and survived two bouts of cancer. My daughter and I have a great relationship. I did get to Iceland, eating not packing fish, and have spent time in Ireland.

I could get a T-shirt that has the Edith Piaf song "Non Je Regette Rien."

I regret nothing.